I know that sounds harsh — but honestly, so is the way we talk to ourselves most days.

If someone spoke to you the way your inner voice does, would you still be friends with them?

Because for years, I was that friend — to myself, without even knowing it.
I pushed. I overanalyzed. I guilt-tripped.
And anytime I slowed down, I told myself I was being lazy or falling behind.

No one had to criticize me; I did it on autopilot.

When I Realized My Inner Voice Wasn’t Actually Kind

For the longest time, I thought I was nice to myself — at least compared to most women I knew.
I thought I had a healthy relationship with myself. I didn’t tear myself down openly, and I assumed that meant I was being kind within, too.
I didn’t fall for most beauty trends, I gave my body size and shape some grace, and I genuinely thought I loved who I was.

But one day, my coach suggested I write a letter to myself — with one rule: I could include only the negative things I said in my own head.

What poured out shocked me.

I couldn’t believe the narrative running behind the scenes — one that quietly whispered I wasn’t good enough in nearly every area of my life except for work.

That’s when it hit me: no wonder I placed so much emphasis on my salary, title, and success.
They were the only things my subconscious believed made me worthy.

I wasn’t confident — I was surviving the only way I knew how: through achievement.

The Energy of Self-Compassion

Being kind to yourself isn’t a bubble bath and a mantra.
It’s choosing not to weaponize your own mind against yourself.

It’s catching the voice that says “You should be doing more” and responding with “Actually, I’m doing enough.”
It’s recognizing that flow can’t coexist with self-criticism — your body doesn’t open in safety when it’s bracing for attack, even from you.

When you shift from force to compassion, your nervous system relaxes.
Your creativity expands.
Your intuition gets louder.

Because self-compassion isn’t weakness — it’s energetic alignment.

Learning to Talk to Yourself Like You Matter

You don’t motivate a flower to grow by yelling at it.
And yet that’s exactly how most of us try to evolve.

You grow by nurturing. By giving yourself the grace to learn, pause, and begin again.
You flow by trusting that rest doesn’t mean regression — it means readiness.

So the next time your mind starts playing the “not enough” game, pause.
Ask yourself: Would I talk to a friend like this?
If not, stop being an asshole to yourself.

You deserve the same compassion you give everyone else.

💫 If you’re ready to stop forcing and start flowing — to trade self-criticism for self-connection — explore my Offerings, created to help you realign with your true energy.